29 de novembro de 2009
Olá nerds desafortunados!Hoje sabemos que os brasileiros estão tudo; estão no orkut... na.. no.. e também no... bom, deixa pra lá. O fato é que a nova moda agora é o "tuíter".
O lugar ideal pra noticiar a galheera sobre a quantidade de línguas que você rapou no fim de semana; colocar aqueeeeela foto sua lendo a Veja de ponta cabeça na privada ou até mostrar IN REAL TIME como você é rico com aquela foto de pose de dono-do-morro segurando 5 notas de 1 reau e seu motorola v3.
Bom como migrar para essa nova maaaaaraaavilinda tecnologia? É fácil rapaz. Aqui você aprenderá como migrar rapidamente para o Twitter sem perder os seus trejeitos e o que te fazia ÚNICO no antigo orkut.
Chega de papo e vamos lá!
1-) CRIE SUA CONTA.
Entre na home do Twitter e preencha seus dados. www.twitter.com
Já aproveite para salvar a sua foto antiga do orkut por que provavelmente o amigo que photoshopou ela pra você não poderá fazer esse milagre novamente.
2-)ESCOLHA UM NICK FÁCIL DE IDENTIFICAR
É pelo nick que vamos te conhecer! Use termos fáceis de ser encontrado pelos seus velhos companheiros do orkut.
Ex. twitter.com/manu_obroooder_dotrafeGo ou twitter.com/g4t1nh4_safadosa2010 . Se achar que esses exemplos não batam com sua índole, você não está preparado para o twitter, afinal é hora de se reciclar amigão!
3-)SIGA OS CHAVÕES
Você só será popular no twitter se seguir os famosos. Simples assim.
@rafinhabastos @marcelotas @mionzera @twittess @crisdias @cardoso @aplusk @oprah
Oi? Não conhece nenhum desses? Que derrota. Olha, não precisa conhecer. Só siga!
@crisdias : homem? mulher? quem é crisdias?
4-) FAÇA O QUE O TWITTER PROPÕE!
"What are you doing?", em bom português: "ke ke c tah faxenduu"?
Escreva minuto a minuto TUDO, eu disse TUDO! o que você estiver fazendo?
Deu aquela febre e vomitou a noite inteira? twitte isso! Ou melhor ainda, twitte cada contração e cada grau celsius a mais no seu corpo. Deu diarréia? Melhor ainda!
Todo mundo quer saber o que você está fazendo! Nada melhor que postar as coisas rotineiras também. "estou pegando o ônibus", "estou sendo assaltado" ou "comprando a massa da semana" são exemplos de coisas que as pessoas adoooram ler ;D
5-)USE HASHTAGS
O #twitter inovou com uma #nova #ferramenta, as #hashtags. Elas funcionam como uma #marcação de um #assunto em #potencial. Se #houverem muitas #hashtags iguais no mesmo dia, elas vão para os #TrendingTopics que são os #bafões do dia.
Agora que aprendeu, porque não postar 6milhões de hashtags com seu nome? Hum?
Quem sabe você não fica famosão e aparece lá pra tooodo mundo te ver? É sua chance de ficar famoso.
Brasileiros tentando entrar pros TT com temas polêmicos
Mais brasileiros, mas com um gosto melhor
Exemplos de hashtags são #BrazilWantsJonasBrothers, #chupa e #forasarney.
6-) POSTE FOTOS!
Achou que isso ia ficar de fora né? Como você iria postar suas fotos bêbado da balada aqui?
Bom, naturalmente o twitter não aceita imagens, mas um espertalhão criou o twitpic que é um lugar que guarda suas fotos e posta elas pra você!
Agora que tem esse trunfo, mande ver! Encha sua timeline de fotos e tirinhas de homenzinhos de palito. É super divertido!
7-)CONSIGA SEGUIDORES AUTOMATICAMENTE
Tá dificil conseguir seguidores mesmo com as dicas acima? Puxa vida, como o mundo é injusto com você, mas mesmo assim não desista! Temos a solução pra você.
Use sites como o http://GetTwitterFollowersForFree.com/ ou o tente a nova estratégia dos famosos!
Diga que você sorteará um iPhone para seus seguidores assim que conseguir 6 milhões de deles! Você não precisará dar um iPhone, já que dificilmente terá essa quantidade, conseguirá seguidores rapidinho e meeeesmo se você alcançar um dia essa marca, chute um perfil falso e todo mundo vai achar que ele ganhou. =)
Barrichello comprando conquistando seguidores para ser POP
8-)ESQUEÇA MSN. PAPEIE VIA TWITTER
Hoje em dia ninguém mais tem privacidade mesmo. Fale com a gatxinhax. Twitte o que você está ouvindo. Dê aquela cantada sem importar que todo mundo veja!
É muito legal ver a sua página cheia de papos dos outros. Mesmo você não querendo saber o que eles estão falando.
Japas trocando namoricos no twitter. Notem a linguagem caliente.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Bom, é isso aí! Agora é sua vez! Seja pop e vá pegar geral e ser popular
34 comentários:
é coreano, não japonês rsrsr
obrigado pela dica Hugo, mas é mais divertido escrever 'japas' que orientais ou coreanos. =)
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hey everybody
I just wanted to introduce myself to everyone!
Can't wait to start some good conversations!
-Marshall
Thanks again!
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